Writing

Where to Hold the Light?

Lester

Image by Taylor Burnett from Pixabay
There’s a quandary at the heart of entertainment, and recent events with Ed Sheeran’s concert tour of the Americas illustrate it perfectly.

Hold that thought.

A Buddhist student once asked their master, “How can I be happy in a world where so many are suffering?” And the master said, “It does the world no good for you to add one more unhappy person. Allow yourself some light, so that you can then share it with others.”

Then again, at what point does that become picnicking on the lawn of a burning house with people locked inside?

Yet without joy, we lose our humanity. Particularly now, in authoritarian times, joy is an act of resistance.

Okay, back to Ed. Recently P!nk asked Ed to drop the rapper Macklemore from the tour, after he shouted “Free Palestine!” during a performance. Sheeran’s tour promoter insisted upon it. As I’m writing this post, four other bands have dropped out in solidarity with Macklemore. Sheeran and Macklemore still speak of each other as friends (as do the rest of the bands), but there’s a critical disagreement at the heart of their artistries.

Sheeran wants to keep a safe space for attendees to escape politics and simply participate in joy. Macklemore’s music includes protest for social justice. And the bands who have dropped out clearly prize that same activism. (The motives of Sheeran’s tour promoter, billionaire Robert Kraft, are perhaps more suspect.)

So I’m brought back to the metaphorical question of light, and how and where to shine it.

I’ll be honest, the past 10 years have driven me to a point of mental unhealth. Every day is a struggle to escape the rut of heartbreak with current events, my limited ability to change their course, and frustration toward family and former friends who support them. My every bedtime requires discipline to hold onto something pleasant; my every waking requires that discipline immediately again.

Which is to say that the flame of my joy is guttering. And I still haven’t figured out how to divide its remaining light between creation and activism. Nor can my soul survive at the expense of one over the other.

This website is my 26-year journal of that struggle.

A River Does Not Choose

Lester

(Inspired by War and Peace, Vol. 3, Part 1, Chapters 1–7)

A river does not choose its course to sea.
Winding across the plains, water discovers
its way—among gullies and hills encounters
a natural inevitability.

Nor does a seedling choose its path through earth
to sun. Sensing the pull of gravity,
it pushes upward—finding a destiny
of gaps between the clods that give it birth.

So, faced with each new moment, you and I
make our own choices—though what we choose is fixed
in our own natures and the arithmetics
of fate. Our needs and options minify
down to an instant’s narrow-focused glass—
our souls revealed by what we bring to pass.

—Lester Smith, 2011

I am not a Linux evangelist, but . . .

Lester

If you’ll forgive this YouTube video’s clickbait title, the content is actually a pretty balanced explanation of what’s happening with Windows right now.

For most of the past 40+ years, I’ve been a Windows user because that’s what was generally an employer’s OS for writing and editing. And for a home computer, it’s been cheaper than Apple. But when an employer preferred Apple, I’ve happily used Apple. I may have bristled at Apple’s gated community, but I’ve also admired the stability it brought.

So whenever friends or family members have asked about their best choice, I’ve sized up their needs and personality, and suggested either OS to suit. Never have I suggested Linux; I didn’t even want to go down that path myself.

But now? If asked for a recommendation, Linux would be a reasonable third option. Apple for stability and ease of use, Windows for compatibility to most publishers, and some brand of Linux for simple, unobtrusive, day-to-day operation.

I’m not a Linux evangelist. Personally, for most self-publishing, I’m still using Windows 10, and I will until either (a) my old Thinkpad dies, (b) I run out of backdoor options for OS security updates, or (c) a Linux alternative to Affinity Publisher becomes available, to suit DriveThruRPG’s PDF requirements.*

I’m no Linux evangelist. But a few weeks ago I got so fed up with Windows 11’s bugginess and Cortana insistence that, with some trepidation, I replaced it with Linux Mint on the HP Envy x360 laptop I bought last year. The installation was nigh perfect directly from a thumb drive. I was thrilled to discover that even a popup touchscreen keyboard was available right “out of the box.” The single exception was no drivers for the internal speakers, and even that fix was just a simple OS update.

Watch the video. You’ll understand why Windows is becoming increasingly frustrating for the average user. Maybe an Apple Mac is the best choice for you. But don’t discount Linux altogether. It might be just the OS you’re looking for.

*Yes, Scribus can manage, but there’s less guidance for a sporadic user like me.

And every single month . . .

Lester

And every single month, my eyes misread this as “autopsy.”